Infidelity will ultimately cause a rift in any relationship, even if one party isn’t aware of it. Finding out your partner has been unfaithful can be a deal-breaker, and will destroy your trust in them in a way that’s often impossible to reconcile. It can be devastating to uncover this kind of betrayal, but not knowing whether or not your suspicions are founded can be even worse.
Insecurity about a partner’s commitment can rear its head at any time during a relationship. Often, fears of infidelity with occur as a result of other problems – problems that, after years of marriage or cohabitation, are bound to arise at some stage. But what if you are suspicious of a new partner? How do you know whether or not to take the relationship forward if you’re unsure of their history?
Being in a partnership requires us to embark on an almost entirely blind leap of faith. When we’re young, this kind of trust comes easily. But time and experience can leave us feeling jaded and untrusting – especially if you’ve been betrayed in the past. In this instance, going forward with a new partner can be terrifying unless you know exactly who you’re letting in to your life.
If you’re currently plagued with anxiety about your other half’s fidelity, you may be considering ways to prove or disprove your suspicions. In the modern day world, there are of course a number of technological advances that have made this kind of evidence irrefutable – such as video surveillance, for example.
But while taking matters into your own hands can be an effective way to find out what you’re dealing with, it’s always best to try and tackle the issue with your partner before going behind their back. Although they will hopefully understand where your insecurities have stemmed from, if they are innocent, they may be offended by your distrust.
The most obvious solution to this problem is to talk to them one on one. Rather than accosting them when they’ve just got home from work and becoming immediately confrontational, it’s best to carve out some time where you can sit down and have a proper discussion. It’s important that they don’t feel like you’re backing them into a corner.
Start by addressing your insecurities, explaining why you feel that way. Make sure they know that you’re not trying to offend them in any way – but you’re anxious about the state of your relationship, and you deserve to know the truth. Ask them calmly and slowly if they are having an affair or being unfaithful, and allow them the time to respond.
Of course, it’s often difficult to know whether or not a person is telling the truth, particularly if they become overly defensive. If you keep suspecting and confronting your partner, this can become a vicious cycle which will ultimately destroy both of your trust. In this instance, it might be wise to outsource some professional help from a detective who can help you know for sure.
Private detectives can carry out discrete surveillance to ascertain where a person is really going and who they are meeting with. This involves a combination of vehicle tracking devices, computer tracking and manned surveillance operations. These professionals can also carry out background checks and asset tracking to help you obtain all the information you need about your partner’s behaviour.
The evidence you will be presented with can be used as evidence to support you, should you ever need to file for divorce on the grounds of infidelity. If your relationship or marriage has broken down, it can be critical for you to gather evidence that will help you prove your partner’s wrongdoings – and for you to gain access to the truth, whatever the outcome.